Hitting Rock Bottom
Life moves in seasons. Sometimes we hate the season that we are in. But every season comes to teach us. I’ve been in winter hibernation for a long time. There was a lot of bad things about that time of which self-hate and self-neglect were the worst. When you have the weight of the world on your shoulders it is often very hard to look past the pain and suffering to see the potential for growth.
Strange as this may sound to you, one of the best things that can happen to anyone is hitting ROCK BOTTOM. Everyone who has ever done something significant in their lives, will share with you what the turning point for them was, and it is normally hitting rock bottom. It tells you nothing comes easy, it teaches you what you are made of. Failure is what makes you strong. You reach decisions and pull yourself out of the black hole when you hit rock bottom and how you respond when you hit this dreadful low will say a lot about your life and what you will become.
Having the courage to do the work that needs to be done to rise from your lows is exceptionally brave. We all have that bravery, that inherent will to survive. It is a primal instinct. Ways to rise strong after hitting rock bottom are:
1. Feel the pain
It is no use to deny that you are in pain. To be able to recognise the pain, sit with it in the dark without trying to flip on light switches, is a necessary step in getting up from your lowest point. Let the darkness surround you without allowing your soul to be absorbed by it. If you can sit with the pain, the warmth of the morning sun and the spring air will soon enough reward you with a new beginning.
Self-care and being compassionate towards yourself is one of the most important steps I teach in my Body Bolder program for women. Caring for yourself is the highest form of self-love. Without that present in your life it is impossible to move with purpose and stand in your power. When you beat yourself up over and over again about your failures, the way you look, your inability to stick to good habits, your lack of self-control around food, you are programming your mind to attract more of the things that you don’t want instead of becoming the person that you always dreamed of being. Self-care is a subject of separate discussion of which I will be doing many blog posts over the next few months to teach you how to get this important aspect in your life sorted.
3. Take 100% responsibility for your life
During difficult times in our lives, it is very easy to play the blame game. You are trying to make sense of why things are not going well for you, and you want to know who is responsible for your pain. It is easier to blame than to look within. But when you finally take responsibility for your life it implies that you are giving up all of our excuses, all the reasons why you can’t do something, all your victim stories and blaming outside circumstances. It is not these circumstances that are stopping you, it is you, when you think limiting thoughts and engage in self-defeating behaviors. Everything you think, say and do needs to become intentional and aligned with your purpose, your values and your goals.
4. Return to the thing you love
Hitting rock bottom is often a result of moving too far away from the path that you once aspired to follow – that big dream, that brave goal. Somewhere along the line a lot of us let go of the dream and become realistic, we lose our spark. Youthful dreams don’t have to be delusions. And right now is a good time to take stock of your life and reawaken your younger self who believed she could set her mind to anything and achieve it. Reigniting your passion for life will renew your ambition to become the best version of yourself.
5. Share your story
Jacques –Yves Cousteau said it best: “If a man for whatever reason has the opportunity to lead an extraordinary life, he has no right to keep it to himself.”
I decided not to keep my story to myself anymore and I am busy crafting my message of overcoming depression, anxiety and self-hate after a failed marriage followed by a lot of emotional upheaval. The path I am following now is an effort to share with whoever feels drawn to read it. It makes me feel vulnerable at times, but it also feels very good to share and inspire others with my story. It is important to share your gift with the world, each of us has a story that can inspire and motivate people in need. Sharing brings you out of hiding and self-pity because you are not just focused on yourself anymore. Your story becomes bigger than you.
Finally, I want to tell you that now is not the time to give up. You are only strong enough to face the fiercest test when you have experienced the breaking point. Everything you have been through, every tear, every moment of total hopelessness and despair must push you to your destiny. Today is the day!